8 Challenges You Could Face In Your First Year Of Marriage

8 Challenges You Could Face In Your First Year of Marriage

It’s said that the first year of marriage is the hardest one. The adjustments and changes that spouses encounter as newlyweds topple almost every other period in life — you and your spouse may feel stuck between the couple you used to be and the married couple you want to become. Marriage is a big risk; it can guarantee a lifetime of love, fulfillment, security and satisfaction, but it can also lead to quarrels, abuse, loneliness and divorce.

Here are the top eight challenges that spouses may need to overcome in their first year:

1. Domesticity Problems
The first thing that springs to mind is anything associated with domesticity. This means anything that can be lumped into what we like to call “household chores,”like washing the dishes, doing the laundry, tidying up or cooking dinner. For many recently married people, sharing a house with someone else is entirely new. Trying to divide the tasks in a fair and even way can put an enormous strain on a relationship.

2. Financial Issues
Financial issues always crop up in the first year of marriage. Being married means sharing everything, spending money together,saving money together and dividing the income fairly. For the first time ever, you can’t simply decide to save up for a holiday or a new car; nor can you impulsively buy that new pair of designer boots. Your partner’s financial sensibilities have to be taken into account.

3. Romance Challenge
When you’re married, it’s easy to stop being romantic.There’s an element of safety, and the “you’re not going anywhere” mentality comes with a dwindling of the things that can make a relationship worth it; testing and calling from work, going out for a nice meal, flirting and looking good for one another.

4. Personality Differences
Living together means spending a lot of time together, so it’s inevitable that certain lifestyle differences will become abundantly clear. You might enjoy eating out while your partner might like to stay in and cook. You might like reading, and your partner might prefer watching television. It’s important to negotiate, compromise and find a balance.

5. Lifestyle Changes
As a married couple, the first year will bring a whirlwind of lifestyle changes. In your dating period, it was probably very relaxed, casual and fun. In a marriage, these things are inevitably combined with some of the more boring stuff, like planning, working, stressing over money and sleeping early as opposed to going out and dancing. It’s important not to resent your partner for this.

6. Parental Influence
When you’re dating, it’s just the two of you. When you’re married, it’s the whole family or both families. You have in-laws to impress. You’ve taken their child away, so they’re bound to stick their noses into your affairs.Parental influence can be a real burden on your marriage before you get used to it.

7. Unexpected Fights
The first year of marriage is said to bring an influx of fighting. This is probably because you’re with each other all the time for the first time since your relationship began. Plus, the fights may have an intensity that they didn't have before, and you might feel like you have fewer places to escape.

8. Independent Plans
It becomes easy to start acting independently of one another in the first year.Bound by the wedding ring, you might feel more inclined to make plans without consulting your partner. If you get into the habit of doing this early on, there’s a danger it might affect your entire marriage.

Marriage can be the most rewarding decision that you’ll make in your life. If you make it to your first anniversary, you’re halfway there. By establishing a strong base on which to build, the rest of your married life should be something you can anticipate, plan towards and look forward to.

Culled: MarriageGuide

Share, enjoy and Like!

We Appreciate Your Time On the Blog...Thanks For Dropping Your Comments. If you need to contact the crew of Bosydeprincessa on BreakingNews/TipOff/Advert/Features/Life happenings in and around your zone, Email: info.posche@gmail.com Bbpin: 7BB53FED(Bizness)

10 Signs of A Bad Relationship and Why You Need To Leave!

Over the time and talking from experience, ;) I have come to realise that many women and men stay in relationships even though they know they're undervaluing themselves by being there. Sometimes they’re undervaluing themselves because the other person isn't good enough or the other person genuinely can’t handle the rights and responsibilities that come with a relationship. One of the most popular phrases that people use to conclude their relationship post mortem is…..

"The signs were there early on but I ignored them" or "looking back I wish i had listened to so so person (e.g your then selfish friend)

Here I will be sharing insightful Signs you need to leave a relationship.....unless you want it to end disastrously....! 

1) They tell you they don't want to commit: " We can't take this further because I'm not ready for what you really want" so you can be in the relationship but no commitment!

2) They tell you they don't want a relationship: so why are you there? 

3) All your closest friends and family have concluded they're the anti-christ.

4) You're tired of trying to change them: you can't change a person, only God can.

5) You're trying to change them: don't even try it because it won't work.

6) They told you they're not ready even at the settling down age.

7) You have massive doubts that you channel by biting your nails and screaming at the homeless.

8) Women:- They make you cry (weekly)
Men: - They cause you utter the words "I hate me" (daily)

9) You've split up and made up so many times that everybody including you is confused with your relationship status. 

10) You know it’s going nowhere and definitely going no where. 

To my friends and subcribers out there whose friends or someone they know might be in any of the listed situation, my advice is RUN as fast as your leg can take you!

Please share, comment and Like!

Have a splendid Monday!

12 Basic Fundamental Truth You should Know About Relationships

Majority of us forget the truth about relationship, and this sometimes makes your relationships more complicated than they are. After reading different articles and books, I gathered few things together, Here are simple reminders to help you keep them on track.

1) All successful relationships require some work. – Successful relationships don’t just happen, or maintain themselves. They exist and thrive when the parties involved take the risk of sharing what it is that’s going on in their minds and hearts. Open communication and honesty is the key.

2) You get what you put in. – most of the time, you get what you put in your relationship, If you want love, give love. If you want friends, be friendly. If you’d like to feel understood, try being more understanding. It’s a simple practice that works.

3) You shouldn't have to fight for a spot in someone’s life. – Never force someone to make a space in their life for you, because if they know your worth, they will create one for you. I always say to people never make someone your priority when you're only an option to them, if they know you're worth it they will make you their number one.

4)There is a purpose for everyone you meet. – People come into our life for different reasons and purpose, Some people will test you, some will use you, and some will teach you; but most importantly some will bring out the best in you. Learn to see and accept the differences between these people, and carry on accordingly.

5) We all change, which is only normal– Our needs change with time. When someone says, “You’ve changed,” it’s not always a bad thing. Sometimes it just means you stopped living your life their way. Don’t apologize for it. Instead, be open and sincere, explain how you feel, and keep doing what you know in your heart is right.

6)You are in full control of your own happiness. – happiness Is a choice you make , If your relationship with yourself isn’t working, don’t expect your other relationships to be any different. Nobody else in this world can make you happy. It’s something you have to do on your own. "And you have to create your own happiness first before you can share it with someone else. If you feel that it’s your partner’s fault, think again, and look within yourself to find out what piece is missing. "happiness is a choice you make".

7) Learn to forgive.. – Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” It doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened. It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life. (read post: letting go of the past")

8) You cannot change people; they can only change themselves. – Instead of trying to change others, give them your support and lead by example. If there’s a specific behavior someone you love has that you’re hoping disappears over time, it probably won’t. If you really need them to change something, be honest and put all the cards on the table so this person knows what you need them to do.

9) Arguments are a waste of time. – The less time you spend arguing with the people who hurt you, the more time you’ll have to love the people who love you. And if you happen to find yourself arguing with someone you love, don’t let your anger get the best of you. Give yourself some time to calm down and then gently discuss the situation.

10) You are better off without some people. – When you have to start compromising yourself and your morals for the people around you, it’s probably time to change the people around you. If someone continuously mistreats you or pushes you in the wrong direction, have enough respect for yourself to walk away from them. It may hurt for a little while, but it’ll be ok. You’ll be ok, and far better off in the long run.

11) Small gestures go a long way. – Honour your relationships in some way every chance you get. Every day you have the opportunity to make your relationship sweeter and deeper by making small gestures to show your appreciation and affection. Remember, making one person smile can change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their world. Your kindness and gratitude matters.

12) Even the best relationships don’t last forever. – People don’t live forever. Appreciate what you have, who loves you and who cares for you. You’ll never know how much they mean to you until the day they are no longer beside you. And remember, just because something doesn’t last forever, doesn’t mean it wasn’t worth your while.

Ciao!

-bosydeprincessa

Habits That Might End A Good Relationship!

We all get to that stage in our relationship where we feel completely at ease with each other, well it is only normal. But when you get so comfortable that you neglect friends, your manners e.t c then things can start going downhill.
If you want to avoid major drama in your relationship, resist the ten habits below that are known to ruin otherwise healthy relationships.



1) Criticising his/her family...
No matter how you feel about your boyfriend/girlfriend's family, making it known to him/her just how much they drive you crazy is bound to drive an irreparable wedge into your relationship. So it's best to hold your tongue when the subject of his family comes up.

2) Letting yourself go....
Not only is it bad for your health and overall well-being, but letting yourself go -- whether that means gaining weight or not caring about your appearance -- after settling into a relationship is one habit that sends a bad message to your partner: if you stop caring about yourself, he may assume that you've stopped caring about him too.

3) Forgetting your friends....
Have you ever had a friend who has suddenly partnered up with the guy/girl they’ve been raving about for the past few weeks and then you don’t see them again for months? Maybe that “friend” is actually you? We’ve all probably been guilty of this at some point in our lives. No matter how much we love spending time with our other half, it’s important to keep in regular contact with our friends for the sake of our own sanity. 
Our pals remind us that there are other things going on in the world aside from romance, and they keep our feet firmly on the ground when we start getting swept off into romantic dream land. Spending all of your time with your other half usually ends up with you getting bored of each other pretty soon into the relationship and this is a recipe for disaster.

4) Spying...
You may think you're doing yourself a favor by keeping up constant surveillance your boyfriend/girlfriend's phone, Facebook and Twitter habits; however by being aware of the minutiae of his/her whereabouts and thoughts, you're more likely to do your relationship more harm than good.you get paranoid and scared for nothing. Oh never forget.... You start Nagging!

5) Fighting in Public.....
It is natural for couples to have the occasional argument, especially after being together for any significant amount of time; however, fights that become so uncontrollable that they regularly spill out into the open, damage your relationship! I say you can have arguments. But in public, among friends act like nothing is going on.

6) Sharing Your Secrets With Your Friends.... (To my dear Ladies)
Discretion is one of the chief qualities of a good relationship. Therefore, be sure to keep various aspects of your love life for yourself and your partner. Men in particular can feel extremely vulnerable and irritated if they find out about a problem or a secret from their friends and not their partner. Talk over the delicate issues with your partner rather than confessing them to your friends.

7) Trying to improve your partner....
Many women think they are helping the men that they're with by trying to make them over, however, by doing so; they only end up causing more problems for the relationship.

8) Allowing problems to fester.....
Everyone would like to think that they have the perfect relationship; however, if in your quest to avoid creating drama in your relationship, you frequently allow things that upset you to go unsaid; you are doing yourself and your partner a great disservice. Good communication is the cornerstone of any happy, long-term coupling.

9) Taking each other for granted...

• Do you turn to him/her for his thoughts and/or advice? 
• Do you consider him/her when making a decision? 
• Do you thank him /her when they've done something good and/or right?
• Do you thank and compliment your partner when they mean well? 
• Do you listen to him/her and/or pay attention to his/her needs?

10) Lying....
Lying to your boyfriend/girlfriend for any reason does not bode well for a successful future together. Just don't do it!

Comment, share and Enjoy!

KISSING VIBES

Apparently men who kiss their wives every morning live 5 years longer than men who don't. Apart from being a way to show affection, kissing has also been scientifically proven to reduce stress considerably by releasing certain hormones into the body.

Coupled with cuddling, it serves as a good symbol of reassurance to the females, enforcing the feelings of security and love. It s also an excellent way to kick of foreplay which may eventually lead to coitus.

It is highly recommended that partners involved in kissing should have good breath; this improves the experience greatly. There are several techniques of kissing, the most popular being the "French Kiss" involving the use of tongue. However i am not sure if the style of kissing has its origins from France or if only french speaking people round the world started it.

Some females have been known to prefer the act of kissing to actual coitus relations. They can be kissed on the lips, neck, forehead, shoulder, cheeks, in fact pretty much any part of the body.

Comment, Share and Like!

Men Cheat, Women are Materialistic... Is it True?

Happy weekend to you, you and you. I hope the weekend is going as it were planned, if not... take a seat and read on as I bring to you another interesting write-up in our relationship and life segment. 

Am sure you are conversant with the statement:

“ALL men are chronically unfaithful.”
“Women are materialistic.”

These are two of the most common phrases in any conversation about relationships in all over the world. I’m exploring the validity of those statements.

While majority of  men complain about the materialism of today's modern women, apparently our women are totally consumed with thoughts of money; of course not all men cares about cash, well i think some still do.

Haven been opportune to visit other continent and meet with people of diverse race, ethnic and belief. I realise that the perception on Love and money in a relationship does not differ at all. For instance, in Nigeria where I am from, they’ll tell you that a Nigerian girl, especially the Lagos girl, falls in love with your wallet before she even looks at you. When I first heard this complaint, I felt so bad for our men. Poor kiddos, how could they cope dealing with these greedy materialistic girls? I mean I know I’ve definitely judged Nigerian girls harshly. College girls from struggling families have two hundred and fifty thousand Naira (plus) weaves, the latest smartphones, and expensive trips abroad, I know it’s their pocket-money doing all that. As I’ve grown older, I’ve gotten kinder, and less judgmental(here’s hoping though).

On the flip side, Nigerian women moan about the legendary infidelity of Nigerian men, Nigerian men can’t be trusted. Listening to the variety of stories about the men is absolutely petrifying; some get engaged to two women at the same time, others take mistresses on their honeymoon, placing them in the same hotel as their wives, while others maintain two families or sleep with the maids and nannies. Unfortunately, these stories are not fiction; we all have a few of them in our families or our close circle of friends. It’s enough to make a girl reconsider getting into this thing called marriage.

Even though I do not want to be judgmental, I  had experiences that have made me rethink who gets the blame in this messy situation. Recently a friend was talking about setting up a close friend of ours; apparently he had a number of single friends who would be ideal for her (Shola). Call me a skeptic, but I was surprised that he knew so many people who Shola could have fulfilling relationships with, not because she is difficult or anything of course. His answer was that they all had really well-paying jobs. Now don’t get me wrong, I would not want my to be with an ambition-less pauper, but I think there are many other qualities beyond a well-paying job that make someone a potential partner, like that pesky thing called compatibility. However, in his experience security is the first thing a Nigerian girl asks about.

Its also no surprise that, even while I was in Nigeria several years back, hustling the street of Abuja as a naive marketer, I’ve been on the receiving end of Nigerian men both young and old trying to throw money at me. Yet when you refuse their blatant offerings, and try to find out more about them, they are uncooperative but they’ll complain about materialistic women. I’ve heard multiple times that the majority of Nigerian women are unintelligent and unable to have decent conversations. This is generally said as a back-handed compliment to me, others in the same vein say things like “you have beauty and brains”, as though the two are incompatible. Apparently women just talk about movies, celebrities and make-up. Hearing this you would think these men are coming up with the solutions to Syria and Nigeria’s problems in their daily chats, lol!. Nah, generally they are discussing football, PS3 and if you are lucky, how to make money. I find these comments extremely insulting and not flattering in the least. I for one have never noticed a marked deficit in female intelligence among my friends and casual acquaintances, if the only women they encounter are unintelligent, the problem might be with their selection criteria not women in general. I’ve had as many terrible conversations with men as with women. This paragraph is brought on by a recent experience I had on a “date”, my date asked a question regarding some of my future academic pursuits. As I began to answer the question with the seriousness I felt it deserved, I noticed he wasn’t paying attention; he was looking down and chatting on his phone, how rude. This was the same guy who had previously commented on the lack of intelligent conversations. Ironic eh?

I’ve spent a good bit of time considering both angles and I’ve reached a conclusion, it’s truthfully a chicken and the egg situation. Are the women materialistic because they realize that’s all they can depend on the men for? Are the men unfaithful because they are with women who choose them for only for what’s in their pocket? Do men present the situation to be used through their own laziness? They rather flash their bank cards than spend time courting a women learning about her interests and what makes her tick. Do women simply utilize the opportunities presented to them by men? Are both men and women simply not just using each other?

After interacting with men and women, both at home and abroad. I’ve decided that this system is mutually beneficial for the active players. The men get bought women who are so desperate for money that they’ll do anything to stroke their man’s ego. These women will turn a blind eye to all their misbehavior, and accept crappy treatment from them. The women on their part have embraced the ideology of “it’s as easy to love a rich man as a poor man.” As long as they are kitted out in the latest designers, get to travel abroad and drive nice cars, life is good. I only feel bad for those who are genuinely searching for love, for that person that completes them. 60%  are looking to be married just to be, 30% consider marriage to be their meal ticket and the remaining 10% (probably an overly generous estimate) are sincerely searching for love. Yes, these statistic are just randomly thrown out from my brain, but I don’t think the results would be different if I performed a rigorous scientific study. I’d love to hear if y’all agree or disagree.

Have a blessed week.

-bosydeprincessa

Comment, Share and Like!

10 Tips On How To Make Your Man Fall In Love With You

Hey my beautiful damsels, you really need to show your man that you have what it takes to drive him nuts. Prove your worth to him and watch him stay. There is hardly any woman or lady out there who does not want to be in a relationship where the man she is in love with is over heels crazy about her too.  Making your man loving you back as he would isn’t hard at all, with the foundational spice I called PATIENCE, and you will be able to.

Below I will be discussing some few tips on how to achieve this; every lady out there needs tips.

10. SHOW THAT YOU ARE INDEPENDENCE

Firstly of all, you need to show that you are independent, and not a lazy fag that depends on every penny from him to get your needs met. It is important that you show him how strong and entrepreneurial you can be. One thing I have come to realise with guy-girl relationship is that, men loves that hardworking, goal oriented babes. Trust me, if you think sticking with him at all times and relying on him will work, then you might need start thinking again, it’s only a matter of weeks or months before he starts avoiding you and finally dumps you.

9. YOU AR NOT A PARASITE

This explains the constant sticking to a man. Neither is following him around will make him want or appreciate you more. You do not always have to be in front of him preparing yourself to so anything he wants.  Men love to have their space, some time out alone by themselves or with the boys like they sometimes call it.

Therefore, it is important that you give him some space, so as not to look too desperate or cheap.

8. DO NOT TAKE HIS PLACE

As much as I always talk about equality, there are some roles that you cannot do when you are in a strong relationship that leading to the alter. When you allow a man to show his masculinity, he will take the lead. As much as you don’t want to be seen as been too over independent, there are certain roles which should be left for the man, trust me men loves it when the women they love seek there counsel.  Don’t we love to be pampered… here is the time to show that.

You should be thankful when he steps in and help in some ways.

7. KNOW HOW TO ENJOY YOUR LIFE

If you have a gloomy appearance and you are always looking sad and depressed, then you cannot expect to attract a man. A cheerful disposition is good always, radiates a man spirit. Make him realise that you have a good life.

6. GIVE HIM SUPPORT WHEN RELEVANT

No matter how strong someone is, even men; there is always a point in their life when they will need to have some sort of support, a shoulder to lean on. It is not the period to act over neither nagging nor paranoid. At this point, learn to be sensitive to the subject of discussion.  When they need it, you should be there for him and encourage him.

5. ALWAYS LOOK PRETTY

When some ladies get married, they let themselves go simply because they now have their spouse. You should not let go. If you went to the salon to get your hair done before you got married, then keep doing that. If you were smart and trendy when he first married you, why stop how?

This is mostly targeted mostly to the married ladies out there. Looking good is good busy. If you man is the one that likes you in skimpy wears, I see no point why you shouldn’t wear that which keeps the spice in your married relationship. Then stay smart and hot for him, it will keep his love and affection for you and will see no reason to look elsewhere.

4. JEALOUSY

I have seen many ladies that try to spend as much time with their friends in order to make their man jealous. This will drive him crazy thinking of those hours with your friends. While I would never do this, because I believe your hubby or man should be your best friend, there are some ladies out there that will recommend this. Again, it all depends on who you are.

The more he craves for your company and attention, the more the relationship grows stronger and the more the love.

3. BE A GREAT LISTENER

One sure way to get your fiancés to be so into you is during your discussion or chit-chat, you show him that you are interested in his discuss by paying rapt attention and listening to him. Men loves it when they have a woman that cares about what they tend to share and discuss for instance, football..

Don’t be self-centred by always talking about your desires and your life alone.  Give him some space to communicate his mind while you listen. Men like it when they are appreciated and praised for their actions.

2. MAKE YOURSELF UNIQUE

There are many women out there that are attractive too. You need to set yourself aside from them. Making yourself outstanding and unique is a key to a man’s heart.   

The point here is finding something that makes you unique and go with it. It is never advisable to just flow with the trends.

1.       1. JUST BE YOURSELF

In the end, you should be yourself. Do not try to be like some super star you once saw on television. Don’t put up an act, be yourself and earn his respect.

Feel free to share your experiences. What do you do to set yourself apart from the other ladies?

How did you make your husband or spouse fall head over heels in love with you?

Share this with your friends on facebook and twitter, simply click on the share button.

Travelling Abroad: How Favourable Is It To A Relationship?

It has become a normal saga that when people travel out of the country leaving the other partner behind, there is always an iota of doubt in the continuation of the relationship. 

Why should a relationship end because one partner went to study abroad or for business purposes. Some don’t even stay for 2months before changing. They begin to complain of busy schedules, busy bla bla bla……..and the likes. The fact is when some people get there, they feel they are in their comfort zone and they can do what they like. They feel its better to go for someone over there for a better advantage. 

Some guys begin to date white women because of their hidden agenda(getting a stay permit). Am not saying anything is wrong with dating a Whitey. Whatever the case may be, I feel distance is a test of love and it's an opportunity to know how much you will be faithful and honest to your partner. 

If you can’t be faithful due to distance, then you won’t be when you are married and busy with different assignments here and there. It all boils down to personality. 

Do you also know that 80% of people end up disappointing their partners. 10% pretend to still be in it while with someone else there. The remaining 10% try to be faithful and keep to their promise. 

So now, is it good to travel abroad while  leaving our partner behind? 

Yeah!!!for good purposes some of you would say. If this is the case, why then should there be fear in the other partner that that’s the end of the relationship or are there more reasons to it. 

Let’s discuss here please……..what do you think about this? 

Share this with your friends on facebook, twitter. 

Follow Blog via Email.  Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email: info.posche@gmail.com

Weekend Trillz: Top 10 (sexy) places your man can touch you to please you!

You may think that you know where all of the erogenous zones on your body are, but there may be a few that you have no idea about. New research has shown that there are quite a few spots on the body that will drive you crazy. 

Here is a list of the top ten spots: 

1. Clitoris: Everyone knows about this spot. It is the erogenous zone that is hit the most. With thousands of nerve endings bundled together, it is the most sensitive spot on your body. 

2. Vagina: This is another common one that many know about. If you keep up with your Kegel exercises it can intensify the pleasure. 

3. Mouth and Lips: You may not necessarily think of this as an erogenous zone, but haven’t you ever been turned on by a really good kiss? Alternate between soft kisses and a good hard make-out session to get things going. 

4. Nape of your neck: This is a very sensitive spot with a lot of nerve endings, so any touch here can send shivers down your spine. 

5. Breast: When this zone is touched your body releases a chemical called oxytocin which heightens your mood. 

6. Nipples: Another commonly known erogenous zone. There are many nerve endings here, but everyone has a different sensitivity and what they like so make sure you communicate with your partner about what you like or don’t like. 

7. Inner thigh: There are many nerve endings in your inner thighs, but you may need a little more pressure on this spot. Try having your partner run and ice cube up and down your inner thigh for an intense sensation. 

8. Back of your neck: Just like the nape there are many nerve endings here. You may want a little more pressure, so have your partner give you a nice massage starting at the shoulders and working his way up. 

9. Ears: Many people like having their ears nibbled. Have your partner lick your ear and then gently blow on it for an intense feeling. 

10. Lower back: Finally we have the lower back. Getting a quick massage here as part of foreplay can not only be sensual but it can relax the pelvis and make sex more enjoyable.

Culled: Women Magazine